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The Rhythm and the Blues...

February 5, 2019

 

Riding, listening to songs from a summer playlist that was made on a road trip. I never thought it would be therapeutic... that was never the intention. The goal was to have songs that we could vibe to and that would remind us of all the concerts we attended. And just our overall delight for music and the artists alike. Some songs at the time caressed the lover in us. Others that imaginary (Jesus Loving) thug that we claimed from time to time. Make no mistake we never lived the Worlds version of thug, lol. We just were so sure of ourselves and confident, even in the wrong decisions we were making. We made light of the term and used it in a way that made us laugh

This playlist started to show me areas where I have healed. No longer do the songs make me feel vulnerable. Instead they make me smile, especially Return of the Mack, Ha! 😊Music has a way of taking us way back into a situation, replaying old emotions, and questioning their validity in the present moment. A way of calling us deeper into feelings, no matter what those feelings may be. So instead of the songs that made me cry and the songs that made me feel revengeful, bringing up those same feelings. I felt calm and Grateful

This is a baby step I’m so willing to take. After the year that I have had, I would take half a baby step.

When it seems everything you have been a part of ended in destruction, you start to feel hopeless and insignificant. Had I known though that the strength I feel building inside me would only be possible due to what I have been through... how quickly I forget...
If I could have only knew in those scared moments, when those melodies played, that one day I could be looking back, Finally Coming Through It. That’s the positive perspective right? To in the moment rejoice that joy is coming. That suffering will be over and that you endured semi joyfully in the suffering. I’m still learning. And I know I will Always be learning. To Love the process and to Love me through the process... 

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