Today, I just needed time to think. And it felt good! To actually have my mind free of clutter and everything moving all together at once. So many things to pray about, so many things to think through, so, many, things...
Life is like being in recovery. Everyone around you is fighting some sort of addiction. Some of the friends you make, face the same demons you do. How do you get “clean” in communion with them? You both agree to walk a path together and then one of you falls short... you try to help in the recovery and may even find yourself slipping back into your old habits. The real fight in life, is being able to help those “addicted” while staying clean yourself. Resisting the urge and temptation to get “just one more hit” of what used to make you feel so good, yet so bad at the same time.
Hello, My name is Cassidi and I am addicted to this life and all it has to offer...to the temporary. The good and the not so good. I am in a constant everyday fight to be the best version of myself. All the while, afraid that at any moment my worldly addictions may show up to confront me. And I might cave... I may accept a temporary in exchange for an Eternal... because the high feels worth it in my thoughts...Ever been there?
What I’m realizing is that many of us do not know how to be anything more than temporary. Too afraid to be More. Thinking, “what if the Eternal never comes.. Let me make the most of this... temporary.” Let me take temporary for Everything that it has to offer because... it’s temporary. Temporary can feel Amazing. But it lacks substance. It’s not fulfilling. It doesn’t sustain. My addiction to the temporary keeps me unhappy. It literally blocks my ability to, Just. Be. Happy. My addiction to the temporary tells me I need something, anything (although many of us have our temporary of choice) to “feel” happy.
So it felt good to just Think. Think through all the false things I tell myself I need. To sift through my addictions and declare them for what they are. To begin to process what I believe they give me and to tell myself the truth of what they are not. They are not mine, is the first truth. And I am telling myself this daily. I want no claim to them. They are those spirits that we read about in the Bible.
The “evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, ... mighty powers in this dark world.” -Ephesians 6:12
The ones that we can’t call the names we think they possess, like Mike or Impulse Spending, or Drinking. They are not always going to be here, as a matter of fact, I’m declaring Eviction today!
And the second truth is that God has provided me with a spirit of discernment. I mistake that from time to time for just an odd thought, if it doesn’t feed my addiction... I have to start using the weapons He has given me to fight the battles that are waged against me daily. So I will embrace the full armor... my addictions cannot survive on Holy ground. Your addictions cannot survive on Holy ground. And I believe if we create a pathway of Holy ground for others, we will see addictions fade away. We will see the chase for the Eternal become something so fierce, and the passion so high, the everything temporary will become as dust in the wind.
Lord God, before I dare judge the addictions of another, remind me I face very similar battles of my own. I am weighed down by situational things that I give far too much control over my life, my moments. God as I remove the plank from my eye, may I remain gentle with those around me fighting addictions of their own. And may I begin to see just how similar we truly all are. Not weighing one as more heavy than another and not condemning because of condition or circumstance. But only Loving as your word displays, Vividly, all the days of my life.