2018, Thank you!! I’m so sorry I couldn’t see what you were doing when you were making me stronger. Forgive me for thinking you were ruining my life. I appreciate you more than you know, for all you have given me and for all that you have taken with you (RA 👼🏾). You gave me power to stand up against ANYTHING 2019 will bring. You have given me courage to face my biggest fears. And you have set me up so sweet for all that is to come! I’m proud of you 2018, you my baby for real!
Is it really about what you’re leaving behind or what you’ve gained to take with you? Life lessons to carry into a New Year to make the birthing process of 2019 all worth it
The pain from 2018 has produced the groundwork for all accomplishments in 2019. I said 2018 was going to be my year, and I said it believing it would look a certain way. It came back pressed down, shaken, and spilling over with MANY experiences that I had no clue how to face, and that I didn’t want to face. But had it not been for those things, I wouldn’t be half the woman I am at this moment, in this brand New Year!
I know growth happened. Although when it was happening it felt more like death. I was pulled and pushed in so many ways that I didn’t know whether I was coming or going. But God...
I can sit here and honestly say that I am at most just as prepared as I am unprepared for this year. However, my approach is quite different. This year I choose to Surrender... What I know is that Surrender is never an easy thing. And in most instances for me it can be quite unnerving. But if I don’t Surrender to just “What Is,”
I may never know “What May Be...”
I’m looking at Surrender in every aspect. The unresolved emotional feelings of attachment that I have to people, places and things. I am Surrendering every time I feel the pull. I realize now that even those emotions I have to “go through” to get to the other side. I don’t want to be hindered in my progression of Self by stopping the flow of Progress to happen. To feel, be okay with not understanding, and allowing it to pass. So that every time it gets easier and easier. The want to be in a different space, whether that is financially, in a career, or even in traffic. I have to Surrender to the reality that I am at the perfect place at the perfect time, For Me. All tying into the Fact that I am in The Perfect Will of God at every moment. That what is happening around me, to me and through me is all apart of His well designed plan for my life. And in order for me to reap the harvest of benefit and flourish under the divinity of Him, In order for my life to be a true show of His glory, I Must Surrender.
So.. I Surrender to the dislikes, I Surrender to the not being good enough, I Surrender to the “its not you its me,” I Surrender to the “sorry we decided to go with someone else”, I Surrender to the I don’t love you anymore, I Surrender to the I know I have hurt you and I’m sorry, (but not really sorry), I Surrender to the I love you, I Surrender to the I miss you, I Surrender to the I’m praying for you, I Surrender to the I want to know more about you, I Surrender to the unanswered text messages, I Surrender to the missed phone calls, I Surrender to the missed opportunities, I Surrender to the night sweats and the tear soaked pillows, I Surrender to the sleepless nights, I Surrender to the world of possibilities and to the mind that is trapped in the impossible, I Surrender to myself... I Surrender to you...
2019, Thank You in advance !💛